Shinobimonogatari
by TrixBella
Summary: You would think that with the state of humans today, you've seen it all. Well...you've never been more wrong about that. Welcome to the Night World.
1. Prologue

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto nor do I own Bakemonogatari. Both works are owned by their rightful creator (Masashi Kishimoto and Nisio Isin).

_**Shinobimonogatari**_

oooooo

A small yawn penetrated the silence of the forest as a figure walked along its path. Blonde hair that reached to her back, tips curled upwards. She was small, reaching the height to that of an eight year old, and was clothed in a simple pink summer dress with embroidered black lace with white sandals on her feet. Wandering aimlessly, she trudged along as she looked around with bored golden eyes.

How long had it been since anything remotely interesting happened to her?

Her golden eyes began to emit a soft glow as she began recalling the past. That silly boy with strange eyes she encountered was the most recent event that she could offhandedly remember. From his childhood to his death she had stuck with him, where in return she had experienced the world change around her.

The introduction of Chakra to the human race allowed them to perform feats that they originally could not do, all because the boy happened to accidentally discover it – she smiled a bit, remembering the time the boy called it his 'super awesome powers.' Of course, the introduction of Chakra did not just affect the humans, no. All supernatural beings were affected as well: minor ghosts turned into vengeful wraiths, demons grew in body and mind, and ones that were already at the pinnacle of their growth turned into forces of nature.

One such creature, the Ten-tailed beast they called it, roamed the lands for many decades. The beast was considered to be the strongest living being that ever walked the lands, destroying everything along its path. Eventually, the strange boy thwarted it by sealing it within his body. Although he knew that this was only a temporary solution, he found a solution by dividing the beast's chakra into nine individual parts, each one forming into an entity. As the nine creatures grew up, the strange boy – who was dubbed as the Six Path Sage – grew older and weaker. The nine, along with her, stayed with him in his deathbed. After his parting words, the group drew themselves into the shadows, hidden away from the world. A funeral pyre was performed by her, in case of people trying to divulge his secrets that were only meant for his two legacies.

Soon after that she too hid away to watch events unfold from the sidelines. Watching as one by one, the nine beasts were sealed into objects and infants, unable to do anything since it was not time for her to act.

She drew away from her thoughts, watching as the wind swept up the seeds of dandelions, and sat down with a sigh.

No matter what happens, they would all be fine. They weren't called Bijuu for nothing, after all.

oooooo

TrixBella here,

I've noticed the amount of activity going on as soon as FF decided to take down stories with content above M on it. It's a shame really, since I was planning on doing lemons and the like on my other stories. Speaking of other stories, I've been really busy since I got accepted into uni and I'm being swamped, with only enough time to read and review stories as well as do some minor beta-ing on the side. It's calming down now, and you should expect updates in the near month or so. This was something that was bugging me for a while now, so I decided to roll with it and see how it goes.


	2. Momentary Life

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto nor do I own Bakemonogatari. Both works are owned by their rightful creator (Masashi Kishimoto and Nisio Isin).

_**Shinobimonogatari**_

_Momentary Life_

oooooo

_She drew away from her thoughts, watching as the wind swept up the seeds of dandelions, and sat down with a sigh._

_No matter what happens, they would all be fine. They weren't called Bijuu for nothing, after all._

Although, she still missed her Foxy-chan. She hoped nothing bad happened to her…

oooooo

A gargantuan creature – vulpine in form, covered with vermillion fur and sporting nine tails – sneezed suddenly, creating a massive gust of wind that tore down the entire Business District of the Village Hidden in the Leaves. Anguished screams tore through the air as men, women, and children experienced the final moments of their lives in torment. Bodies limply flew over buildings, giving them the appearance of ragdolls.

Uchiha Madara, clad in a black cloak, raised an eyebrow under his mask before shrugging as he continued to look at the carnage and destruction brought forth by the Kyūbi. He chuckled manically, the hole in his mask showing the fabled Copy Wheel Eye spinning with glee. His dream of the destruction of the Hidden Leaf was nearly coming to fruition.

His instincts flared to life and he narrowly dodged a tri-pronged kunai, then jumped back to avoid a kick from a man who had appeared suddenly. His blond hair swayed from wild wind caused by the beast beneath him and his cerulean eyes narrowly gazed at Madara, his weapons raised in defense.

Minato Namikaze, the Fourth Hokage and the one person that could possibly hinder his plans stood on top of the Kyūbi's back.

Madara looked at the blond Kage, a frown making itself known under his mask. He readied his chain sickle, intent on bringing down the person that got in the Legendary Uchiha's way, "Foolish brat. No one can stop me from bringing down this wretched village," he callously stated.

Minato scowled at him as he readied to charge, "We'll see about that," he replied simply.

The conversation clearly over, both men performed hand seals for their respective Jutsu.

oooooo

Sarutobi Hiruzen, former but now reinstated Hokage of the Leaf Village, sighed heavily in his chair. The losses from the Kyūbi attack were colossal. Over 70 million Ryo worth of property destroyed, as well as a death count of over 3000 shinobi who died in the line of duty trying to stall the beast and over 1000 unfortunate civilians who were killed before they had the chance to be evacuated. Things were not looking up at all for the Leaf, since eventually other villages will reach word of the attack and thus prepare for an invasion due to weakened forces. Minato had died sealing the Kyūbi's Yin half of the beast within him and the other half, the Yang, inside his son Naruto.

Sarutobi looked at the medical reports in front of him with a forlorn expression. Naruto had begun taking on the features of his tenant, starting with the whisker marks. Kami only knows what more will happen to this poor boy. The sound of crying drew his attention away from his thoughts to the crib just beside him. There, wrapped in a cloth bundle, was young Naruto Uzumaki-Namikaze, hero and savior of the Hidden Leaf. Sarutobi knew that drastic measures were to be taken to keep this child safe. Minato had many enemies outside the village as well as _inside_ the village. Unfortunately, the sealing of Kyūbi inside young Naruto cannot be kept secret due to the already arising rumors of the supposed 'Demon Boy'. Whoever spread them, he knew not, but there would be hell to pay when he finds out.

"So this is the hero of Konohagakure…he's got the looks of Minato alright," Sarutobi's gaze shifted towards the figure that faded in the room.

"No one must know that Naruto is Minato's son, Danzo. You know very well the consequences that would follow if his enemies found out," Sarutobi stated simply, for once his voice showing his true age. He watched as Danzo floated a finger towards the child, watching in mild amusement as Naruto reached for it, before putting it in his mouth. Sarutobi snorted as he watched the so called _Shinobi no Yami_ being manhandled by a toddler only three hours old.

Danzo huffed, but didn't pull out his finger, as he looked at his old friend in the eyes, "Give him to my care, Hiruzen. Considering our options, this one is most likely the safest way to keep young Naruto away from our enemies," he stated. He cut off Sarutobi by continuing, "I know what you're thinking, old friend. That putting Naruto in my care will turn him into a mindless drone."

The Third Hokage released a breath he didn't know he was keeping. At least Danzo admitted it. He glared at his old friend as he continued.

"And you're right, don't look at me like that. You knew that's what would happen. It's inevitable in the line of work that you entrusted me," he pulled out his finger from the babe's mouth, watching as it cried loudly for a short while before settling down as he looked at Danzo's lone eye. He looked back at Sarutobi, "But…I have a feeling, a theory."

Sarutobi searched the man's eye for any deceit or ill intentions. Seeing none, he nodded for him to continue.

oooooo

He breathed out another heavy sigh. That conversation would have to be kept in the back of his head to consider…

He looked at the other piece of information written in the report. Naruto's mother, Kushina, fell into a deep coma moments after the Kyūbi was released from her and his loving wife, Biwako, rest her kind soul, managed to secure Kushina into a safe place before going back and doing her duty for the Leaf.

'No one must know about Kushina's condition, not even Jiraiya and Tsunade. I'll have to assign my most trusted ANBU to keep her safe, and I'll tell Naruto when the time is right. For now, I'll have to rely on my medical staff to keep her condition stable and hopefully Kushina can wake up in time to raise young Naruto,' he thought out as he looked outside the ravaged village of Konoha.

oooooo

_**(Timeskip – Four Years)**_

It was at the dead of a summer night when a figure appeared, his back against a wall. He took slow and deep breaths, taking a small respite as well as determining the situation. He looked back to where he was and shook his head mockingly, "Oh, how the mighty have fallen," he stated. He wore an entirely black ensemble: clothes, mask, sandals, the whole shebang. Even the sack he was carrying over his shoulder was black…wait, sack? "Now, I really should get out of here before I eat my own words."

Done from his small break, he sped off again. The legendary bloodline would now be in the hands of Cloud soon.

oooooo

Sounds of laughter echoed throughout the woods.

A small white butterfly fluttered through before flying higher, evading small hands that were about to catch it. The owner of these hands belonged to a small blond child, looking to be around the age of four. He wore a plain white shirt, blue striped shorts and sported blue ankle-high sandals. His face had three whisker-like marks etched onto each side of his cheeks, giving him a vulpine appearance. His deep blue eyes, faintly glowing in the dark, looked on in childlike happiness as he continued to chase the small butterfly deeper into the woods.

Who cares if he was kicked out again by the matron of the orphanage? He was happy here in this forest, free to do whatever he liked, free to eat whatever enticed him, free to sleep whenever he wanted, and free to be away from the seemingly harsh glares that were shot at him for some reason. The only ones he really liked were his Teuchi-ossan, Ayame-chan, his Jiji, and some others wearing those cool masks that he had met just a few weeks ago.

Too bad he didn't get their names or find out what they were.

Oh well.

"Come back here you!" he exclaimed with a small pout as he kept pace with the butterfly. He would have almost caught had it not been for something bumping into him, making him stumble back into his butt.

"Stupid brat! Watch where you're going!" he heard. He was too dazed to see who it was that bumped into him.

"Ahh! I'm sorry, sir! I didn't know that someone would be here," he apologized as he looked up.

oooooo

Of all the things that could happen, it had to be some little brat that stopped him! Why the hell would someone his age be playing around the famed Forest of Death anyway? He looked at the brat before him with a furious expression.

Blond hair, blue eyes…little brat looked like a miniature Yondaime for crying out loud, and whisker marks? How odd. He was too angry to care anyway.

Chakra flared from around him and he tensed. A squadron of ANBU suddenly popped into view, all ready to mince him to bits.

oooooo

Hatake Shaku, Squad captain of ANBU, was not having a good night.

First, she lost track of young Naruto when she was distracted by the message she received that someone had kidnapped the Hyūga heiress, Hinata.

Second, she dropped her issue of Icha Icha into the ground, smudging a page with dirt that can never be removed. Her teammates made sure to avoid her for the time being, with good reason.

Third, they found the kidnapper, but Naru-chan was with him also! Two potential hostages were available for the guy, and she had to make sure that both were safe. Sensei would come back from the grave and kill her to death if he found out that Naruto was injured gravely. Sharingan blazing under her dog mask, she glared at the man in front of her and pointed her chokuto at him.

oooooo

Naruto looked at the people around him in awe. Those were the same people from last week! What were they doing here? Did they come to play with him? Who was this guy in front of him anyway? Why was he carrying a black bag? Was that bag moving?

"Surrender! You're surrounded by ANBU, so you might as well hand over the heiress and stand down!" a lady said behind him. He turned around and looked at the person who spoke. It was the lady with the Dog mask that gave him candy! Maybe she had more candy to give him…what's ANBU anyway? Was that a type of ramen?

He raised his hand to wave at the lady, "Hey lady with the dog mask! Remember me? It's me Narut-,"

***BOOM***

"NARUTO!"

That was the last thing the blond child heard before accepting the sweet embrace of sleep.

oooooo

A lone crimson eye opened to look at the scenery before it.

A sewer – there were gray, drab walls with cracks running along their and there were pipes that glowed with a blue energy running every which way along the walls. There was a cage as tall as two houses, with a single piece of paper pasted on top of gate, as if it were the only thing that held the cage closed. Water knee high in depth flowed throughout the place, yet despite being soaked in it, the looming form of the figure hidden behind the cage remained dry.

A rumbling chuckle reverberated throughout the sewer, filling the vast expanse with its echoes, "_**I wonder what you did this time, boya,**_" it stated in a deep baritone. Its other eye opened then glazed as if focusing on something. Another rumble of laughter came from it, "_**Of all the things you had to do, boya,**_" it continued, then sighed, "_**Well, seeing as you did unintentionally save that oh so poor princess from a lesser fate, it all turned out well in the end…Don't worry, boya. I'll fix you right up as best I can.**_"

A red light began to illuminate the sewer, growing brightly every second.

It wouldn't do if the boy had died. After all, the Kyūbi no Kitsune still had to meet her container…

oooooo

"Tch, what a humid night…"

She hated hot places. Why else would she be wearing such a loose kimono? Yet despite it being so humid, a gust of wind would occasionally flow by and cool her down if only slightly.

Her long, pink hair fluttered in the wind, covering her face before settling back down to reveal a type of face that one would call a natural beauty. Despite having a scar along her left eye, and having a tattoo on her face, the add-ons only made her visage even more captivating. Although she was one pretty face that did not mean that she was helpless.

Quite the opposite in fact.

Having witnessed the slaughter of her family by monstrosities she loathed mentioning, as well as having her left eye gouged out and her right arm severed from the elbow down from said monstrosities, Baiken swore to take revenge against them. Being self-trained in the ways of the katana, she slew anyone who crossed her path to vengeance. She had no one to rely on, nor did she want any for that matter, since she figured that dependence begets weakness. She was wrong though. It had taken her along with two people, Ky Kiske and Sol Badguy, to take down the person responsible for all her and other's misfortunes. That Man – since no one really knew his name, even his servants – was his given moniker, and even though Sol and her had attempted to him down before, they could not do any damage to him. It seemed as if he just gave up when the trio took him down, Ky wanting to imprison him and Sol and her demanding his head. Outnumbered two to one, That Man faced death with acceptance that made her sneer in disgust.

Whatever his reasons were for his actions, it all went with him to the grave. She didn't care if he was innocent or not, she just wanted him to die.

Now, Baiken – the proclaimed One Armed Ronin during her time – sat lazily on her porch, gazing at the stars as she took a drag from her pipe. After That Man's disappearance, the _Gears_, for she regarded them in disgust and anger, had seemingly hidden themselves in the shadows waiting for a chance to strike. The occasional pigheaded and arrogant _Gear_ that proved its supposed superiority by ransacking a town would be slain ruthlessly by her, and then she would revel in its death before going into town and celebrating with a nice bottle of Sake. She was celibate, since she doubted anyone would touch a woman like her, and she sardonically hoped for the chance to settle down with a husband and family.

"A pipe dream…" she whispered to herself before taking a sip of Sake and sighing in delight.

She could never be more wrong as she witnessed the sight of a body flying helplessly deeper into the woods. Eyes widened in surprise, she grabbed _Momozono_, her katana, and dashed in the direction of the body.

oooooo

Fuck! FUCK! **FUCK!**

How could she have been so careless! She was so captivated by the child's smile (and she bet that her squad was too) that she didn't even notice the Cloud-nin throw an explosive tag at the ground next to the boy and setting it off to provide a distraction.

Oh it provided a distraction alright. She was too concerned for the boy to even think about killing the Cloud-nin, thus apprehending him alive and prepped up for interrogation by Ibiki. She chuckled darkly, her hands in a choking manner as she imagined herself wringing the life out of that fucking Cloud-nin that dared to injure her Naru-chan…no one heard that…good.

She drew her attention back to the search, hoping to the deity or deities above that Naruto was safe. She bit her thumb and performed the hand-seals: dog, boar, monkey, bird, and sheep.

"Kuchiyose no Jutsu!" she slammed her palm at the ground and runes began to spread out the ground. A puff of smoke covered the ground.

"Yo," a deep and gruff voice spoke. As the smoke cleared, it revealed a small brown pug clad in a blue outfit with bandages wrapped around its right paw.

"Pakkun, I need you to find Naruto for me. Do you think you can do that?" Shaku asked as she brought out a piece of clothing that belonged to the blond child.

The miniature pug brought its head up to sniff the piece of cloth and immediately took off in the direction that the scent emanated from. Shaku followed, leaping from tree to tree in hopes of spotting the blond ray of sunshine from above. She clenched her fists in anger, "I won't let you down, Sensei…Obito."

oooooo

Uchiha Itachi, fellow ANBU member, looked at Shaku with concern in his eyes. He knew that Shaku clearly adored the boy after he was born. Seeing as how Naruto was Minato-sama's legacy, it was obvious that Shaku would dote on the boy like a mother would. He also had wanted to have Setsuna befriend the boy, seeing as how he had little friends to begin with. Hopefully, Setsuna wouldn't judge the boy like the other bigots did. Foolish, Naruto was the hero that saved Konoha from its destruction and would continue to do so. Demeaning him further would only drive the poor kid into despair and thus unleash the tailed beast to finish what it started.

Sharingan flaring to life, he scanned the area as he followed his superior in hopes of finding the boy.

He just hoped that it wasn't too late.

oooooo

Sarutobi looked down at the man that could potentially destroy them all with fury in his eyes. Said man was currently chained to the wall, his form barely recognizable and barely clinging to life. Ibiki and Inoichi made sure to draw all the information from the Cloud-nin while keeping him alive.

The nerve of Kumo to do something so ballsy, if he weren't so furious right now he would congratulate the Raikage for attempting such a thing…before pounding the man to the ground. Konoha would get away unscathed from this ordeal, seeing as how this Cloud-nin is alive so to speak, while Kumo would be the one to take the backlash. Sarutobi waved his hand and an ANBU agent dropped down from the shadows, "Status report on Uzumaki Naruto," he stated.

The Ferret masked ANBU saluted before reporting what had transpired in the Forest of Death, "Sir! Uzumaki Naruto is still currently missing. We currently have Uchiha Itachi and Hatake Shaku still searching for a trace of the child, sir!"

The Third Hokage clicked his teeth, rubbing the bridge of his nose, 'What should I do, Minato?' He looked back at the ANBU and replied, "Good work, Ferret. Continue with the search, and stop at nothing from finding Naruto."

Ferret saluted once again before fading away into the shadows. Lucky sonnuva bitch, that Naruto was. He already had Cat and Dog doting on him.

oooooo

"What an unfortunate child, you are," Baiken stated as she looked at the boy she carried over her shoulder. She had seen that his body landed against a tree, his left side bleeding profusely and his head covered in wounds. His breathing was ragged and pained; it was a miracle that the boy was still among the living. "Not to make fun of your misfortune, but you're the one making things interesting here…I should probably fix you up."

Baiken took off to the path leading to her house. The boy would be safe and away from the creatures residing in the Forest of Death. During her travels, she had glanced upon the art of seal crafting and she had immediately taken to it. It helped her a bunch considering she had many hidden weapons that were now sealed within the tattoo of the stump on her right arm, as well as having many practical uses in everyday life.

Her place was secure, ridden with anti-detection seals that kept anyone that she didn't like from bothering her.

Baiken's thoughts were dismissed as she arrived at her destination, a small sized traditional house, _Sukiya-zukuri_ as it were called. Rock steps that led to the front entrance, with a small koi pond placed to the side. With beige paint and a brown roof, it blended well with the background of the forest. It was her pride and joy, a house that she painstakingly worked on, _shōen_ _no mori _she dubbed it.

A small groan that transformed into a whimper made her look at the boy. The sudden gust of wind made the boy shiver in cold. His clothes, still wet with his blood didn't help either. Why would the boy even be near the forest? Where were his parents? His guardians?

Baiken shook her head as she tried to warm up the boy with her body by fixing his position and giving him a semi hug. Although the action may be intimate it was no time to be prudish. Questions can be asked later and she had an inkling as to who could answer them. She closed the front door after entering and set the boy down gently on her futon before leaving to grab her medical supplies.

She came back to witness with wide eyes that the boy's form was shrouded by a bubbling red aura, shredding his clothes and leaving him naked as the day he was born. She took no notice of it as she watched with a mix of awe and disgust as his severed left arm and bloodied face were healed, the blood around it dissipating into the red aura. Unfortunately the arm was not renewed as well as his now missing right eye, but fortunately the bleeding stopped. Baiken sat down next to him as she continued to watch his wounds closing, his breathing slowing down and his pained expression relaxing and turning to that of content. A few more moments and the red aura withdrew into the boy, her eyebrows shooting up in surprise as she witnessed the seal on his stomach. Memorizing the seal before it faded, Baiken got up and went to get a fresh set of clothing for the boy.

She knew now who to talk to for answers.

oooooo

The sound of moving water pulled the boy from darkness. Naruto's eyes cracked open then he immediately sat up. He scratched his head in confusion as to how he was in a sewer when he was in his playground before. Then he wondered why he wasn't wet when he was knee deep on water. Despite this, he got up and looked around. As far as he could see, this was a large sewer with filled with blue pipes. A deep red glow caught his attention and he looked at the one pipe that was a different color than the rest, red in color with the other pipes surrounding it glowing purple. His three year old mind getting the best of him, he followed the red pipe to its destination.

Eventually, the line of the red pipe stopped and he ended up in a cage that dwarfed him. He noticed something that caught his eye, a piece of paper stuck in the middle of the cage with scribbles written on it. Naruto was about to go and pull it off, being the child that he was, before a rumbling voice spoke, "_**I wouldn't do that if I were you, boya.**_"

The voice chuckled as it witnessed the boy jump at the sudden noise. Naruto looked around with fear in his eyes, "Who's…who's there?" he asked out loud. He immediately regretted his question as red eyes inside the cage opened to look at him. Naruto would have taken a step back, but for some reason was rooted in spot. With no choice but to look up, he gulped and asked, "Where am I?"

The red eyes softened slightly at the nearly tearing and quivering form of the boy, "_**Come closer, boya,**_" it stated. Naruto felt compelled to do what it said, and did so. A furry red tail popped out the cage and was placed in front of Naruto, "_**Come. Sit down,**_" it said.

After getting situated around the thing's tail Naruto, his nervousness and fear replaced by curiosity, looked up at the red eyes with the unspoken question of where he was.

The red eyes drew closer to Naruto, revealing an orange muzzle and fox ears, _**"You know…you're not supposed to be here, boya,**_" it stated.

Naruto's eyes grew wide before tearing up. He looked at his feet, "I'm not?" he asked. He looked back up at the fox who was chuckling in amusement, "What?"

The fox shook its head, "_**That's not what I meant,**_" it replied. At the boy's prompting look, it continued, "_**I meant that you're not supposed to be here **_**yet, **_**boya.**_"

The blond child blinked, "Oh…" then looked at the fox questioningly, "then when am I supposed to be here? And where is here anyway? And why are you here? Why are you so big? And why-mmph" Naruto glared at the offending tail that was preventing him from speaking, then at the fox that would dare shut him up.

"_**How would you like to hear a story, boya?**_" the foxed asked and immediately the boy's train of thought derailed at the mention of a story.

The fox chuckled, '_**You've got quite the attention span, don't you, boya?**_' were her thoughts before she started regaling the boy with tales of her adventure.

Kyūbi wasn't above tooting her own horn after all.

oooooo

It's been one day since Naruto missing and there hasn't been any trace of where he could have been. Shaku discovered where the area his body landed judging by the blood splotches on the ground, but so far that was the only indication that Naruto has been there. He couldn't even find Naruto using the viewing orb for some reason, and that frustrated him. The child being dragged off by the animals in the Forest was out of the question, seeing as how they left no trail marks. Anko dragging the boy somewhere else was also out since she also assisted in the search…

Sarutobi sighed in irritation, dragging his hand over his face, as he tried to figure out what happened to his unofficial grandson. His eye caught a picture frame on his desk, and he smiled slightly. It showed a picture of him and Naruto eating ramen at Teuchi's shack, with Naruto holding his bowl and grinning and he himself smiling as his hands were on top of the boy's head. Last week had been his birthday and this was taken as a piece of memory that he would cherish for a lifetime.

"Ma'am, I'm sorry but you can't go in there!" the voice of his receptionist caught his attention.

"Fuck you. Get out of my sight before I cut you to pieces," now THAT made him worried. He hadn't heard that voice in a long time.

"I'm going to have to ask you to step away from the door, madam. No need to get violent now," that was one of his ANBU stationed at his door.

"I'll show you violent!"

"No, wait-"

"**TATAMI GAESHI!**"

Oh no…it's her…

"Oh god…! My little boys!*cough*" the same ANBU now had a higher pitched voice than before.

Sarutobi jumped when the door to his office was kicked open, showing one of his ANBU on the ground clutching his unmentionables, and an irate pink haired woman. She wore a white kimono, loosened at torso which left little to imagination; a red obi with a single flower embroidered on it; black socks that left the balls, heels and toes of her feet open; she had a black arm wrap on her left arm, and the right side of her kimono was flowing freely, indicating that she was armless (though she was anything but); situated at the left of her waist was a katana three feet in length. Her face was still beautiful as well as deadly, with a scar on her left eye and a tattoo that started from her forehead to her right eye. She looked at him with a scowl, while he looked at her with surprise before his expression turned to that of joy as he noticed that Naruto, seemingly asleep, was hugging her neck while she was carrying him with her left arm.

"Osaru," he looked at the woman in front of him with wide, surprised eyes, "I've got a bone to pick with you."

Baiken was back, and she was not happy.

oooooo

_Stats (out of 5)_

**Uzumaki-Namikaze Naruto**

**Ninjutsu: 0**

**Taijutsu: 1**

**Genjutsu: 0**

**Intelligence: 1**

**Strength: 0.5**

**Speed: 0.5**

**Stamina: 1**

**Hand Seals: 0**

**Total: 4**

**Baiken**

**Ninjutsu: 4.0**

Taijutsu: 5.0

Genjutsu: 3.5

**Intelligence: 5.0**

**Strength: 5.0**

**Speed: 5.0**

**Stamina: 5.0**

**Hand Seals: 4.0**

**Total: 36.5**

**Hatake Shaku**

**Ninjutsu: 5.0**

**Taijutsu: 4.0**

**Genjutsu: 4.0**

**Intelligence: 4.5**

**Strength: 3.5**

**Speed: 4.0**

**Stamina: 3.0**

**Hand Seals: 5.0**

**Total: 33**

TrixBella here,

How's it goin everyone? Enjoying the self-destruction of FF dot net? I'm not. Anyway, here's chapter one/two of Shinobimonogatari. I don't know if I'm too happy with this chapter, since it's just a whole information dump that you all have to deal with.

Yes, Shaku is femKakashi. Shaku, short for shakuyaku or peony, was one of the names that Kishimoto wanted to name Kakashi with and so I wanted to use this one. There's no reason not to anyway. Setsuna is femSasuke.

I'm not too sure on pairings though. The guaranteed ones will be NarutoxfemKyuuxBaikenx? (the ? being a mystery character that will be revealed later on). I put up Baiken, one of the characters in the Guilty Gear series, in there for a reason since this will be a crossover with Bakemonogatari, and the story will deal more with the supernatural (i.e. ghosts, demons, etc.) than with the ninjas. Don't get me wrong, I'll still be doing canon events, but I'll also mix things up with original missions and the like.

See you all later!


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